Turning Your Insights Into Change in Intimacy
From the outside, it looks like you have it all together. You’ve worked hard to build your life. That same effort shows up in your intimate life too. You’ve done therapy. You understand your patterns. And still, in intimate moments, nothing changes. Waiting starts to feel like its own kind of cost.
Insight alone often doesn’t translate into something different in the moment. In over a decade of working with couples and individuals as a sex and intimacy coach in the San Francisco Bay Area, I’ve seen that lasting change happens through connection with another person. Without lived relational experience, understanding stays where it is.
I work with you as a practice partner for a focused period of time. What happens between us becomes the vehicle for change. We stay with patterns as they arise and explore new ways of responding. Over time, those responses are felt, not just understood, and begin to hold outside of our work.
This work can take two forms: coaching or Surrogate Partner Therapy. Both are grounded in direct experience, with different structure and scope.
Depending on your needs, the work may be entirely platonic, or include touch that isn’t erotic or romantic. We move at a pace that’s right for you, within a structure that holds the work.
I keep my practice small and selective so I can stay fully present. I don’t take on more than I can give.
You can learn more about my perspective and approach through the interviews and conversations below.
I work with people of all genders navigating challenges in their intimate lives. You may recognize yourself here:
Intimacy and Sex for Couples
When sexual disconnection starts to erode the relationship, it can become harder to access the emotional closeness between you. Couples intimacy coaching helps you restore that connection and build the erotic life you’re both longing for.
Relational and Sexual Confidence for Men
Being capable doesn’t automatically translate into feeling at ease in intimacy. When sex has started to feel like a test, or closeness keeps slipping away, this work builds something more durable. Confidence that comes from actual experience, not just understanding.
Gender-Affirming Intimacy Exploration
For trans, nonbinary, and gender-expansive people, gender-affirming intimacy coaching follows your lead rather than someone else’s assumptions. Here, your sense of self guides the work, and we go at a pace that’s yours.
Trauma-Informed Intimacy and Connection
Sexual and relational trauma shapes how the body relates to itself and to closeness, in ways that feel automatic and hard to shift. With care, we stay close to what’s present, and don’t ask protective responses to disappear before they’re ready.
Sex, Shame, and Purity Culture
When early messages about sex and the body were rooted in shame, the effects don’t just fade with time or insight. This work helps you find your own ground. What you want, what feels right to you, separate from what you were taught you should want or fear.
Support Around Kink and BDSM
Desire that has stayed in fantasy, especially desire that feels loaded or hard to name, doesn’t have to stay there. This work helps you understand what you’re drawn to and meet it with more comfort, in ways that fit your life.